500 Montauk Highway, Gate # 2
Oakdale, NY 11769
Tel: 631.277.7800
Location Type: Mansions




Capacity (reception):
Capacity (dinner):
Max. affairs (at same time):
One Event per Day
Separate reception room:
Outdoor reception area:
Outdoor cocktail area:
Dance floor:
Valet parking:
Coat check:
Air conditioned:
Off premise available:
In-house party planner:
Live music allowed:
DJ allowed:
AV equipment available:
Yes (Rental Fee)
Guest accommodations:
Near By
Kosher available:
Kitchen on premises:
Must use in-house caterer:
Must use in-house liquor:
Outdoor/Indoor Ceremonies
Bridal changing room:


Price range per person:
Starting at $119
Room fee:
Advanced booking required:
Advanced deposit required:
$3000.00 (caterer)
Seasonal pricing flexibility:
Room availability (hours):
Until 2:00 am


  • The Bourne Mansion is incredible in every way! When my fiancé and I chose the Bourne, we did so because of their beauty, presentation, and historical old world charm that is truly unique and one of a kind! Never in a million years did we imagine that our wedding which was scheduled for March 27, 2020, would end up being postponed due to COVID19. As you can imagine, this was an extremely difficult and anxious time for us. Despite this set of circumstances that were completely out of our control, Miriam Aronson and the phenomenal staff at the Bourne Mansion went above and beyond in our team of need! They were immediately responsive and miraculously did everything in their power to seamlessly arrange our new wedding date. Most importantly, they set all of our worries and concerns at ease. There are no words that can describe how truly grateful we are to the Bourne Mansion. I highly recommend this amazing venue! Contact Miriam, she is the very best!!

  • Dear Miriam, I just wanted you to know what a beautiful wedding my daughter had Friday 8/5. The Bourne Mansion was the perfect venue choice. Everything was exquisite. Every last detail was taken care of with the utmost perfection. Steve was fantastic in organizing the wedding and running a tight ship. The service and food was the best. I have been receiving texts and calls from my guests telling me that was one of, if not, the best weddings they attended. I have never been to the Bourne Mansion for an event but was so very impressed I would recommend it to anyone who asks. As a matter of fact my cousin's daughter, Jessica Panzarella, is getting married there April 2017. Thank you again for an amazing night.
    Mary Guardino

  • Good afternoon, Five days was needed for me, the MOB, to recuperate from a most spectacular event at The Bourne Mansion on 9/24/16, my daughter's "dream" wedding. It was the ultimate in perfection all around according to family and friends. Where can I begin.....ah, the breathtaking interior of the mansion venue with its superior exterior grounds; the lavish cocktail hour selections, particularly the incredible sushi station which was refilled numerous times; the delectable menu of tender filet mignon, Mediterranean chicken puff pastry, and broiled filet of salmon; Rolling Pin Bakery sweet cannoli cake; and the energetic, interactive and entertaining 10 piece East Coast band, a preferred Bourne vendor who kept the guests grooving on the dance floor the entire night. Five star kudos to Miriam Aronson, Director of Bourne Mansion Sales, who patiently and lovingly worked with us for 15 months during the planning of this special wedding day, and to Steve Melita, the General Manager of the Catering Division of Lessings, who was present at the affair all night making certain that all went smoothly, and I mean, 'everything' went smoothly. When assistance was needed he jumped right on it with flair and professionalism. Steve made sure that my daughter and her husband ate their dinner and were hydrated, something I neglected to do at my own wedding, and he even slow danced with me, the Mother of The Bride. Steve's staff was incredibly attentive, particularly Lucy, who when requested, quickly turned on the lobby lights to assist the guests trying to locate their place cards so the line would move faster. A huge thank you to our angel, Janet, my daughter's 'day of' wedding planner who works for Deborah Minarik Events. Her friendly demeanor, exceptional organizational skills and assistance, and her hard work were extremely appreciated. She allowed my daughter and son-in-law, the bridal party, our families, and especially me to feel comfortable and at ease throughout the entire day and evening without having to worry about incidentals. She took care of it all! We were so grateful for her. May my daughter, Lauren, and her husband, Steve, have as much fun in Portugal and Spain on their honeymoon as they had at their Bourne Mansion wedding!!! Affectionately, Eva Mother of The Bride

  • Hi Miriam, Just wanted to write to say THANK YOU for EVERYTHING you did to help make Saturday night absolutely perfect for us. We could not have asked for anything else (and for a perfectionist like myself to say, that really means a lot!). The food, the decoration, everything, was just perfect. Our guests raved about all of it and it is largely in part to you. We will be emailing Steve as well to thank him for all he did, as he was so helpful the night of and helped everything run so smoothly. Also, we haven't been able to find a bunch of picture frames we had out on the mantle in the main lobby area. Any chance those have turned up somewhere? If they do, if you could please let us know that would be great. They were all of the memorial pictures. Thanks so much, again, for everything!!!!
    Ally and Jeff

  • Dear Steve, Before Michelle and I head off to our honeymoon, we wanted to send you a sincere “thank you” for making our dream wedding a reality. In the weeks leading into the Big Day, you made the entire planning process as easy for us as you could. And from the moment we walked into the Bourne Mansion, you were there to guide us through the entire night. The Mansion was set up beautifully, and no detail was overlooked. We were so impressed with the organization and execution of the night. Our guests were all blown away by the beautiful venue, perfectly groomed grounds, and amazing food (in fact, several guests had mistaken the Cocktail hour for the main dinner!). Most importantly, you made us feel like we had so much time. We’ve always been told that the night would be over in the blink of an eye, that we’d never get to eat anything, and we’d never be able to visit every table. But you and your team have perfected the timing. We had plenty of time to dance all night, eat dinner (all 3 entrees!), and still visit all 17 tables to thank our guests for coming. You made us feel like royalty – personally delivering our drink of choice to us on the dance, along with ice water, and a damp towel to cool us off. We had read reviews online about how great Steve was, but even those reviews don’t do you justice. So thank you, Steve. Our wedding wouldn’t have been nearly as perfect without the attention, support, and direction that you gave us on Friday evening. Sincerely, Andrew and Michelle
    Michelle and Andrew

  • Dear Steve, Magic! If challenged to define in one word, last week’s wedding of our daughter Marissa and son-in-law Noah at the Bourne Mansion this would be it. You and the Lessings’s Organization helped make our celebration one which everyone who was there said was “amazing!” Working with you was a true delight. We felt totally confident in your command of the day’s flow in everything from getting the ceremony “just right” to getting us fed first so that we could make the rounds to personally greet each of our guests. You also worked terrifically with our wedding officiant and our band to bring a seamless flow to the day. It has also occurred to us that you have this other wonderful skill set that probably often doesn’t get the attention it deserves. You so well managed the intricate ballet of getting two hundred-fifty people comfortably seated for ceremony, “toasted” afterwards, happily served at multiple bars throughout the entire party, and well fed at cocktail hour and again at dinner. We were quite amazed! Many of our guests - including a band’s music director, the owners of an entertainment-D.J business, and a P.R. director for a large corporation who does a lot of events - commented about what a terrific maitre’d we had. We didn’t have to be told . . . we know we had the best and appreciate that fact immensely! Working with you, your assistant, Fegge, Ben Nierenberg (who came through with promised facility improvements that exceeded expectations), Jason Henry (who was so helpful and supportive), and Neal in your office has been a wonderful experience. While we would imagine managing party after party can after a while make them seem mundane, throughout ours you gave ours your all. You and the entire Lessing’s Organization should take pride in the wonderful way you make folks special occasions extra special!
    Marissa and Noah

  • Dear Mr. Melita, We could write a novel about all of the great things that you and your team did to bring a "fairy tale" reception in a "fairy tale" setting to Michael and Dana's wedding day, but a simple and heartfelt "THANK YOU" sums it all up! Your attention to detail, coordination, presentation, and concern for all of our guests was over the top. This is true for every one of your staff members we came into contact with. We also cannot say enough about the quality of food and the service that your team provided. Our guests are still raving about it! Lastly, we can't thank you enough for turning what could have been a very stressful situation for my wife, Anna, after losing her diamond bracelet, into another "memorable moment"! While she was still being overcome with both the agony of losing it to the thrill of your coming up with it, I acted on her behalf by showing my "feminine side" and giving you a kiss. Believe me, it was worth it! Unfortunately, our friends caught the moment on camera and I will be forever explaining it! Again, on behalf of Michael and Dana, my wife Anne, our friends and relatives who traveled all the way from Massachusetts, Colorado, Dominican Republic, and Baltimore, we sincerely thank you for making this day a most memorable and happy one. We would recommend Lessing's and Steve's team to anyone and everyone with a resounding "nobody better!" Sincerely, Michael and Anne Wanyo
    Michael & Anne Wanyo

  • Steve. Dave & I waned to extend our gratitude to you and your staff for the outstanding service we received at Sara & Dan’s wedding reception. The fashion in which you handled the event truly made the entire evening such a wonderful success. It was a spectacular display and our family & friends thoroughly enjoyed every moment. Thank you again fro the care you granted to us, the newlyweds and our new in-laws. Maybe our paths will cross again when we are in the NY area. P.S - We hope our fountain jumper didn’t have a cigar in his pocket. Lynn and Dave Kuhar
    Lynn and Dave Kuhar

  • Dear Steve, I am so sorry I didn’t write to you sooner, but I went away shortly after the wedding to recuperate. I want to personally thank you for the amazing wedding my daughter and son-in-law had at the Bourne Mansion, this past July 3rd. . Selecting just the right venue for their special day was not an easy task. My daughter decided from the very beginning that she did not want to use a traditional catering hall which typically has “glass entrance doors, mirrored walls and marble floors.” She wanted “something different.” After looking at numerous places we discovered the Bourne Mansion. As we walked through the rooms, we fell in love with the charming decor, the comforting atmosphere and the spectacular grounds. From the moment we met Ben we felt like we were in good hands. He was a pleasure to deal with from the beginning and very reassuring about the kind of wedding we could expect from Lessing’s. Even though we absolutely loved the setting, I was very skeptical about what the food and the service would be like. We live in Brooklyn and we didn’t know anything about the place or anyone else who had even heard of the Bourne Mansion. While we were very satisfied with the food service at Timber Point for the Bridal Expo and the food tasting Melissa and Joey went to shortly prior to the wedding, I was very worried what the food and the service would be like the day of th wedding. Knowing the majority of our guests were going to be traveling a long distance, I wanted everyone to feel it was really worth the trip. Needles to say we were not disappointed at all. The service, the ambience, the presentation of the food, the quantity and the taste of the food exceeded our expectations. Your staff was phenomenal. Each and everyone of tham were accommodating, eager to please, polite, helpful and courteous. the entire staff, including yourself, truly catered to us and made us fee like you really cared. My daughter grew up in a home where my husband and I always entertained family and friends. She hoped having her wedding at the Bourne Mansion would feel like it was our home for the day. Here dream became a reality. We had all the comforts of home and thanks to you and your staff it was a huge success. All of our family and friends are still raving about the wedding and how much they enjoyed everything. I would highly recommend the Bourne Mansion for any special event. I can’t thank you enough for the role you played at the wedding. I never realized how important the maitre d’ is at an affair. You are truly amazing. You are so calm, organized, confident and very professional. You had everything under control even the nervous “mother of the bride.” Even though I was very happy about the wedding, it was a very difficult day for me and my daughters. My husband passed away less than 2 years ago, and having this wedding without him by my side was very hard and lonely. You may not realize it, but you made me feel so much better because of the way you handled every aspect of the wedding. You made me feel like I had someone I could depend on throughout the affair. I am convinced this wedding would not have been as successful as it was without you and and our expertise. You and your staff made us all feel important and it was very comforting to know you were there to make sure everything went smoothly and that everyone, especially the bride and groom, was really enjoying the wedding. I hope Lessing’s appreciates you. They are very fortunate to have you. Thank you again for your personal touch, your advice and for your patience. It was a pleasure meeting you. I can only hope that I will be invited to the Bourne Mansion as a guest in the near future. Sincerely Marie Pellegrino
    Marie Pellegrino

  • Steve and Ben, I have been planning events in my career for the last 10 years for three major corporations I have worked for: Disney, Sprint and Pepsi. I was a bride who knew what I wanted and how I wanted it. The hardest part about planning any event is assuring you communicate your wants to the venue and vendors who has to execute and trusting them. I handled my wedding as any other event I have planned in the past, and I tried not to get emotional attached. In all the events that I have done, this went by far the best, the smoothest, and all of my dreams were truly met, thanks to the two of you and the staff at Lessing’s. From the moment Rob and I walked into the Bourne 14 months ago, we realized this was the venue of our dreams. An old mansion, the nostalgic smell, the rich colors, and the feeling that brought us back to generations before us. Ben guided us through everything and worked with us to assure we were able to get everything we wanted with all the extras the Bourne had to offer. He was like our miracle worker. Less than a week before the wedding, we met with Steve, who was going to assure everything we setup with Ben was going to be executed. Robert and I had 18 boxes of stuff, from pumpkin place cards, key chains for the valets, candies throughout the mansion, menus, table numbers, and pictures. Oh and those apple pies favors there were dropped off the day before. My job at this point was to trust, god was that hard. We walked into the mansion on our wedding day, Steve was like our personal bodyguard. He was more attentive to both rob and I more than we could even imagine. He helped us when we were seating. He told us when to eat. He handled a lot of out-0f-control kids' and he did everything with a smile. We used the Bourne house florist, and when I saw the room come together with all my touches, the lighting and the florist Ben gave us, a tear came to my eye. It was more beautiful than I ever dreamed. My guests are still talking how this was the best wedding ever and I truly know they aren't just saying that. From the food to the service to ambiance it was magically. Rob and I look at each and know as much I would like to take credit for everything, I can only say we couldn't have done it without the staff at the Bourne and the vendors they recommended. Any bride and groom would be crazy not to have their wedding there. It is the most unique, well-put-together venue on Long Island. Andrea & Robert
    Andrea & Robert

  • A daughter, with her mom and dad and her fiancé selects the perfect wedding reception venue. She tours the rooms, makes notes in her head of the rooms, tapestries, furnishings, flooring, rugs, and most importantly the feel of the venue. She pays special attention to the driveway, the sunlight, the patios, the vista, and the irresistible splendor of the Bourne. Her wedding day is more than a year away -but she envisions the date blessed with abundant sunshine, warm temperatures, low humidity and clear star-speckled night. She tours the Bourne Mansion with her family. Her decision is already made, but allows Mom and Dad to ask questions and make their own opinion. She is confident she knows the answer already. Her smile is confident and contagious. The ride home concludes that, after all is said, done, and calculated, the Bourne Mansion in Oakdale is perfect... if the weather cooperates with blue skies, late spring temperatures and calm winds from Great South Bay, the formal wedding will have the most perfect backdrop ever at the Bourne Mansion for a truly spectacular event. Time passes as the day approaches. The morning of Sunday, arrives. Brilliant blue skies, whispy white thin clouds appear from time to time, warm afternoon, calm winds... perfect day! The Bourne, fountain waters dancing, green lush verdant lawns, manicured flowering patios, the grand presence of the mansion set at the end of the regal driveway, give way to what little girls' dreams are made of... fairy-tale wedding... The sweeping views from the patios to the Great South Bay and rolling lawns offer not only a tranquility of the Bourne but a truly magnificent setting for photography, graced by sunshine, flora, and an effervescent bride and groom. The sun begins to set to the west as the moon rises in the eastern sky, Stars brilliantly shine at dusk. Boats occasionally dot the southern horizon to Fire Island. Lights glimmer in the distance. The guests arrive. They are mesmerized immediately as they turn into the driveway from Montauk Highway. The guests are now in awe, ready for more. Perfection begins at 6:00 pm on Sunday, May 30, and continues uninterruptedly for the next seven hours and more. Every guest, including the parents of the bride as the hosts for the wedding, are extremely awed, satisfied, gleaming, beaming, and amazed as the evening progresses so elegantly, so seamlessly, so impressively, so continuously. Every exception is exceeded. Every need is anticipated. Every smile is meant. Every courtesy is offered. Every promise kept. And every concern is never materialized. The cocktail hour was magnificent indoors and out. The food was presented professionally, abundantly served, and received accolades of praise from guests. The ballroom created the most breathtaking ambiance for the formal setting of the wedding. Walls awash in magenta lighting, floors polished, table setting meticulously executed brought an unrivaled, unparalleled sense of elegance for the wedding of Marisa and Jameson... surrounded by family and friends celebrating their marriage. The true component to the most detailed event is always the human component. Mr. Steve Melita, a true professional at his craft, successfully orchestrated this event at the Bourne with a seasoned, extraordinarily gifted flair. The level of excellence offered by Steve and his staff gave us extreme satisfaction, and our guests were made to feel special and most welcomed. Nina and I, as the parents of the bride and host for the evening received dozens of wonderful comments over the entire course of the wedding. The most gracious guests concluded that this wedding at the Bourne mansion was the best wedding in memory. Phone calls and e-mails also poured in with comments about the perfection of the evening...food, service, ambiance were first rate! Testimony to Steve and the staff! Stunning! The bride and groom, Marisa and jameson, summed it best with their words, actions, smiles, memories and aura of that day that they will have a lifetime together. Priceless! Finally, a heart-felt thank you to all. Sincerely, Nina
    Frank and Nina Policastro



  • RSVP Tuxedos

    Phone: 631.665.7700















The Knot Best of Weddings Hall of Fame (Opens in a New Window)The Knot Best of Weddings 2024 (Opens in a New Window)Wedding Wire Couples Choice 2024 (Opens in a New Window)LI Weddings Best of 2024 (Opens in a New Window)Manhattan Bride's Best of 2024 (Opens in a New Window)Wedding Wire Couple's Choice 2023The Knot Best of Weddings 2023Manhattan Bride's Best of 2023 (Opens in a New Window)Editors Choice Award 2022The Knot Best of Weddings 2022The Knot Hall of Fame 2022Wedding Wire Couple's Choice 2022Manhattan Bride's Best of 2022 (Opens in a New Window)Manhattan Bride Best of The Knot 2021Wedding Wire Couple's Choice 2021Best of The Knot 2021Wedding Wire (Opens in a New Window)Long Island Weddings Best of 2020 (Opens in a New Window)Manhattan Bride's Best of 2020 (Opens in a New Window)The Knot Award for 2020 (Opens in a New Window)Elite Wedding Professional - Long Island Bride and Groom 2020 (Opens in a New Window)Elite Wedding Professional - Long Island Bride and Groom 2019 (Opens in a New Window)Wedding Wire (Opens in a New Window)Award for Manhattan bride best of 2019 (Opens in a New Window)The Knot Award for Hall of Fame (Opens in a New Window)The Knot Award for 2019 (Opens in a New Window)The Knot Award for 2018 (Opens in a New Window)LI Weddings Award for 2018 (Opens in a New Window)LI Business News 2017 (Opens in a New Window)Best of Manhattan Bride Award for 2018 (Opens in a New Window)The Knot Award for 2017 (Opens in a New Window)Wedding Wire Award for 2017 (Opens in a New Window)LI Weddings for 2017 (Opens in a New Window)Wedding Spot Award for 2016 (Opens in a New Window)